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• (908): View more from New Jersey

  google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again

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• (303): View more from Colorado

  I just spread your mom's ashes with my new girlfriend. I wouldve waited for you to fly home but she was uncomfortable in the house with her remains there. I'll mail you the urn since u handpainted it.

  (510): View more from California

  YOU HAVE A GIRLFRIEND ALREADY!?! WTF WE JUST HAD HER FUNERAL 3 WEEKS AGO!!!!!!!!!!!!

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• (780): View more from Alberta, CA

  He's trying to wipe up all the spilled drinks with a banana

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• (814): View more from Pennsylvania

  I just found her phone in the quesadilla maker...

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• (215): View more from Pennsylvania

  Should I feel bad that I fucked her and made her ride my little brothers razor scooter home?

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• (847): View more from Illinois

  just found $310, wrapped in a rubber band, at the bottom of my sock drawer with a note attached stating, "Make it rain".

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• (503): View more from Oregon

  When I start puking tomorrow, just let me be. it'll start around 8:35. just let me heave. i love this part of my morning.

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• (815): View more from Illinois

  Did you rob me and blame it on the strippers?

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• (478): View more from Georgia

  First day of class and I'm in a bar drinking pitcher #3. Foreshadowing?

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• (859): View more from Kentucky

  apparently we spent 30 minutes inside that big Nike store turning all of their Duke gear inside out. for some reason the employees didn't stop us.

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• (931): View more from Tennessee

  Did you just say he wants to put a baby inside me?

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• (208): View more from Idaho

  Reached a new low last night. Passed out. With my pants down. On the toilet. At ihop. Waitress had to wake me up.

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• (479): View more from Arkansas

  Thursday could be nutella day. You could make me a nutella sandwich and then fuck me senseless

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• (256): View more from Alabama

  Haha, how do I word that nicely? "You got me to the edge of no return twice and failed to let me orgasm, therefore you owe me chicken nuggets or hot wings. Your decision"

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• (313): View more from Michigan

  I may be asexual, but I owe you a solid from yesterday. I am a man of my word.

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