I wish costco sold astroglide.
i wish my brain was less awake, and didn't try and picture what you were talking about.
shouldn't i get a discount if shes pregnant?
So after i got done, she went over and got out her gecko, I felt like I was in an X rated geiko commercial.
she really just asked how mermaids reproduce.
this is a time for prayers...seriously
let us hold hands and pray.. sweet baby jesus please bring us some sweet sweet man loving this homecoming weekend to aid our lonely vaginas it has been a long couple of weeks amen.
Well today was Thanksgiving Anti-Miracle Daydrinkathon so I had to be drunk by 2pm
Dont ask, hes out back rolling around in the yard freaking out. literally just had a 15 minute conversation, only word i could make out was "yellow"
I never thought to pass out in a hotel lobby rather then paying for a hotel room until you taught me that's acceptable at the Hilton
You thought last year was bad... a guy dressed as a clown showed up with cocaine
Welp. I just hopped out of his window to avoid meeting his parents... happy monday!
btw theres a pine tree in the downstairs shower. the guys thought it would be a great free air freshener.
Somehow those two combined like captain planet and shit went haywire
Can vaginas get frostbite?
Lets start a coed nudist frat/sorority. It would be amazing. Or just an orgy club. It would also be amazing
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
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