I like bacon cheeseburgers and the pussycat dolls
Does that mean you want me to loosen up your buttons at carls jr?
just smoked a bowl with my history teacher. i love community college
I think in growing up..I've been having a hard time masterbating to fictional characters
No dude, you can't hot box a bus shelter.
Yes, I did know where her mouth had been, but frankly I think it was a lesson you needed to learn.
you started looking at my couch laughing and saying to it "she thinks I'm talking to you" then proceeded to laugh and talk to the couch some more.
I'm dressed like a deranged cupcake. Let's get fucked up.
I just spent a pre-4th of july celebration riding in a raft being towed by a car through a town that I've never heard of handing out flyers for a river rafting company that I never knew existed. Good night.
don't act like you've never hung your towel on your dick after getting out of the shower
Hold on - sidebar. My best friend just threw a 40 pack of condoms through my window.
Honestly you'd think more guys would be happy to date a cute female dealer, but apparently something about safety or whatever
I've woke up with the same hoodie on backwards, twice this week. I think that's a record
It's like everybody loves Raymond but the total opposite and everyone wants him to die
Even though I'm gonna be a felon I'm having fun for time being.
Whose the chick running for dorm president promising bigger dicks and softer toilet paper? That’s who I m voting for
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