i have yet to find a random guy that would make me want to do any position besides missionary, these are what normal people call "applying standards"
so my car got towed last night. I didnt know it cost 118 dollars to have a college experience
she gave him a mild concussion from throwing him against the wall in an attempt to dance with him. gotta love monday nights at the sandbar.
It doesn't matter if he doesn't speak English because I speak the international language of blowies.
She was kinda tragic... like a puppy that runs into things. Cute but really stupid. So, yeah, I hit it.
You know who really doesn't like surpise in-your-face air guitar solos? Strangers.
dude i have an english essay and a bio lab due tomorow
so basically your not goin out tonight?
who said that?
I got Green Bay stickers to put on my nipples. This way when I flash it will look like I did it out of spirit as opposed to drunkenness
Ever find yourself wondering if your life is God's way of telling a joke?
They made the rule if I caught the ball with my cleavage they would drink the entire beer pong table. I don't think they expected me to actually do it.
I wish I could but I can't. No beer pong or sex on a hammock...such an unproductive weekend
Weed is now completely legal in Colorado and Washington. I repeat weed is now legal! I'm putting a deposit down on a house as we speak.
ROADTRIP.
All in all only spent $2 at the bar ln... Fucking love having a vagina
The bad news is that I stole all your drugs. The good news is that ITS KICKING IN!
The stripper was dressed as the green lantern. Even for a geeky girls' bachelorette party it was lame ass.
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