Covered in glitter and dick. 2010 feels a lot like 2009.
It's all fun and games until you throw up hot cheetos in your drawer.
We team puked and then made sex like wild monkeys. If that isn't love, I don't know what is.
What's more awkward than your little brother in law screaming, "I SAW YOUR TITTIES" at the breakfast table?
His step dad chiming in on the jokes.
She carried my bag of puke down the aisle and the flight attendant wouldn't move the beverage cart so she put the puke bag in the flight attendant's face and said "I have a bag of sickness!" I've never seen a cart move that fast.
I had very briefly met him a few years ago. My friend was tired of hearing us both complain about being horny. She figured she would fuck two birds with one stone.
Invited the whole bar back to my place for an after party.....shit got real with everyone seeing dad drink moonshine like a champ.
the only two hours i was sober on this trip and i managed to break my toe. no one will believe this.
What is soo wrong about a house of half-naked people hugging each other and laughing?
The pinata full of drugs?
I wish drunk me wasn't so into manscaping. Or at least good at it. Either or really
On the food pyramid big dick are "sometimes foods"
Last night I was introduced as the Picasso of getting fucked up so I obviously had to live up to it by chugging long islands
How you doing tonight? I got my butthole licked so i cant complain.
It's Friday you fucking nerd of course I'm drunk.
Like sorry your dick won’t suck itself?
Randomize
