she was definitely a virgin. no ones that bad unless theyre a virgin
your sister was..
If I had a penis, I would stick it EVERYWHERE. I don't know what these guys are doing.
Sending me a thank you card for letting you fuck my sister was completely inappropriate
He got tattooed, peirced, and we're pretty sure he got rufeed by that fat chick. He was like a walking spring break stereotype.
He calls it "his noble steed" and i plan to ride it.
I'm at work, and just realized I the beer smell I keep getting random whiffs of is my bra. I fail at life.
yes and no. im drunk but idk if im "blow marcus" drunk. call in like an hour.
You know it was a good night when you're lying on the couch in your pjs at 4pm having a pitcher of ice water for breakfast.
Finally smoked with my brothers, I feel like I just won gold at the Best Older Brother Ever Olympics
you walked in, put on rap music and started chugging vodka
Sorry it's taking so long, it's harder to take an ass pic with an iPad than you think
Me too like the fact they didn't arrest me wants to send them an edible arrangement
You tried crawling through the apartment window instead of going through the wide open door next to it
I told him to take the baby so I could work out. My workout consisted of getting high and masturbating
I walked into your room and you were wearing party beads, a foam finger, and reading the dictionary. Good night?
Randomize
