Having a conversation over beer pong about a threesome I participated in...it's only Wednesday
I wish I could drop acid with the muppets
Going to a jewelry store high is not a good idea. I look like mr.t's wife.
We have sex, then he cooks. It's like a fantasy.
Some kid in my class just puked in his backpack, zipped up the backpack, put the backpack on and walked out the door.
Jerking off has been your answer to everything tonight.
I have a page in my 2010 scrapbook dedicated to pictures of his cock.
If I ever mention marriage force me to Brazil to do coke and strippers until I die.
Bartender just fed me brownie. Its going to be a good night
Sent him a picture of my pregnant boobs from last year, think he'll notice the difference?
I have to date her we need a place to stay for tailgating
Me and tommy were trying to figure out why our printer was jammed, found a condom stuck in the paper slot. #collegeprobs
Being able to fart in my own house is like 90% of why I pay rent
My new favorite word is dickbag. I think its relevant here. And I say that with all the love in the world.
i may have just googled 'is philly rioting right now'
Randomize
