I can't get into him, he looks really young. I'd feel like I was blowing the Gerber baby.
I just googled "semen solvent" and got nothing. there has to be something that will wash this shit off!
I see a marketing opportunity
I woke up hungover and opened my laptop to find that i had googled alcoholism again
He just used my bikini trimmer to give himself a fumanchu. And I still plan on having sex with him tonight. This has to be what true love feels like.
Cant wait to drunkenly tell by kids that i banged their aunt katie in a weird threesome
Sounds like it could have been the night you pulled out your love stump at the strip club.
I just heard myself say the sentence "I'm gonna go to the bank then take a nap". 8 year old me just slapped my present self through the space-time continuum for being an old fuck.
Pretty sure I was impersonating Rihanna when I kept asking him what my name was while we were making out
The cops came, and I made friends with him. He wants me to babysit his kids.
I think I got a sinus infection from puking out my nose on st. Patricks day #thisis26
I'm having leftover pizza for breakfast. I'm clearly not the greatest at this adult thing.
You threw up with such class too! Tiara and all.
I want to respect them as people, but really I just want to have sex with them.
I'm not saying you're stupid, just that you have bad luck when thinking...
The same idiot-bubble, now just bigger and louder.
Randomize
