She was running around the bar, demanding everyone call her Jesus or else she would attack them like a llama. ack.
im naked on webcam to her boyfriend, but im playing neopets at the same time, so its all evened out
i can't wait to kiss dudes with my vampire teeth in.
Didn't get to fuck her. Had to leave abruptly through window. Explain later.
Oh man I'm using the bubble wrap that wraped my new vibrator to wrap my dads fathers day gift
No I got myself stoned. With her bowl. She was just a casualty of the War on Sobriety.
I renamed his cat Jeff last night. Well I spray painted it on him.
The number of times I have seen your cock and the number of times I have wanted to see your cock are different!
bringing my vibrator into the shower with me. if I don't text back in 30 minutes I have electrocuted myself and died.
May the force be with you.
I just smoked a joint and ate a sandwich while watching someone get arrested. Bonnaroo is a silly place.
I wish I had a picture of me and ron helping that stripper lick her own vagina
I bet you there is porn for people who get off on someone rubbing Chipotle on themselves
I dont pretend to understand how the heterosexual mind works. Its a mysterious cavern of stupidity and disgusting sexual acts.
I could not add him. He gets 5 likes on Instagram.
We’ve got a propane heater on our back porch if you want to come over and eat a McRib in peace
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