My head feels like little people r playing bumper cars inside it
i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
Do I need to let your sister outside to go pee or anything before I leave?
Matt is in the hospital again. the night nurse text me asking not to bring the boombox again. is it sad or awesome that they are starting to know us?
You just kept insisting that you and the homeless man went way back, and that you bonded over how cold you both were.
I found his retainer in my ass crack. It smells like shame.
It wasn't like a party or anything. They played PlayStation and talked about sports. Then I threw up on his porch.
I knew no one else would have gone along with it since it's morally wrong and probably illegal. You said, "Yes. And let's add fireworks."
Hi this is the guy from the cell phone store. Your Dad just upgraded your phone as a surprise. I didn't tell him about your topless pics on your phone. I transfered them to new phone. Nice rack!
If there is a ladylike way to throw up in your favorite toilet, I just did it.
That hot shower felt like it washed away all of my problems... Except being pregnant... Ps just found out I'm pregnant. Fuck.
You haven't lived until you've snorted coke from a Pharaoh's hand baby
MAGGIE IS ON MY COUCH PETTING AN HONEST TO CHRIST ARMADILLO AND SOBBING INTO HOT CHOCHOLATE. WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO TO HER.
we just got sex advice from a midget. You better fucking get here.
Questions: How did Rachel get home? Why did I find both her ID's in my shoes? And does anyone know if she's alive?
Randomize