I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
Sometimes I feel like I shouldn't drink when I come out of a black out half naked covered in puke. Then I realize thats why I drink.
It has to be really easy to get midgets drunk.
im kinda looking forward to winter break. ive been away from home for so long i think i can trick my vagina into thinking that these arent the same people ive been hooking up with since high school...
he gets drunk and then tries to eat the lasers at the dance club
something isn't right. i offered to be his sex slave and he declined..
These old men are woofing at me..PLEASE HURRY
It's like even though I'm not in college anymore my body still knows it's September and is putting itself into competitive binge drinking mode.
I may or may not be negotiating a deal of baked goods for socks...keep you posted
She is the Michael Jordan of blowjobs. Unfortunately, her baby sister is the Michael Jordan of baseball of blowjobs. It does not run in the family.
You can trust me. I'm unemployed and not wearing pants.
You know you're good at multi-tasking if you can get a lap dance from someone while simultaneously eating a burrito.
Sorry I called bc I needed help peeing outside
But I did it
We have been dating for 5 months. I'm friends with his sister. Yet my number in his phone is still saved as "hot bartender"
He only has one ball. it was like fucking a cyclops.
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