Its about time the women of america have a president they can masturbate to again
Whoa Z and x make the same sound
Whoa! I think of you when I eat cottage cheese.
Just so we both are on the same page, I have no solid plans as to where I'll be sleeping tonight.
how do i tell her that i need alcohol to fuck her but at the same time i cant get a hard on with alcohol.
I literally paid him in shots to clean my entire apartment. he even vacuumed...who said alcoholism is a bad thing??
frozen drink friday is suspended until further notice
Well anything after a French guy would have been a disappointment. But I'm fairly certain he was just trying to masturbate into me.
Lets go see if some hobos will give us a prostate massage for a 40 ounce.
you cant ever make fun of my bong's stick on moustache again. its the reason the cop let me keep it and my weed.
I had sex for the second time today and ate an entire bag of alligator jerky on the way home. These truly are the golden years.
I'm not sure what step "make amends" is, but my phone is on
I woke up in the basement of a pizza restaurant... I would say the tequila hit me pretty hard.
if it makes u feel better, i skipped class so i could go to a sex convention in jersey a few hours earlier than if i went to class.
There is this guy in here. He didn't even get ice cream he just filled up his cup with mini marshmellows, chocolate syrup, about a lb of grahm cracker crumbs and walked around to everyone in the shop saying "hey, hey look here, I just made fucking s'mores." He was SO proud of himself.
Randomize