Dude, TWO hot chicks on jeopardy tonight. gonna be a good one
Dude, I am so turned on right now. Hot chick with glasses from brooklyn is absolutely crushing right now, taking whole categories. might beat off to jeapordy...
do another line during during the commercial and make the magic happen during double jeopardy.
Just tried to tap morse code on the wall seperating our beds to tell you I was awake and ready to smoke
Just got an email from TMobile. Said they were going to pursue "more qualified" candidates. So this is what rock bottom feels like.
I love you. I'm too high for this. Find a way. Make it happen. Live strong.
I feel like we shud celebrate your sisters homecoming by having sex in her room
of course we have a beer bong
how else would we feed our christmas tree
He looked at me like he knew me, and I looked at him like I had seen his penis before.
If by "Are you drunk?" you mean "Did you just faceplant in the checkout line at Target?" the answer is yes.
Well, at some point in her life every girl has to decide how much weird she's willing to tolerate for hot tall banker cock
I'm writing off my condom expenses in my taxes
I got a snap of someone jumping off a light pole. Was that you? Please confirm or deny. #onWisconsin
I don't know what to do about my nipple.
I remember the Prince Albert and the three penises in the threesome. But the rest no.
You squatted and peed on the living room floor while maintaining eye contact with Sebastian
Let the healthy eats/juice cleanse begin. Today is day 1
Have you cleansed yourself of the boy yet?
Randomize
