Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
im marching my happy ass in there and im not leaving until he cheats on his girlfriend!
I only gave you my number because I thought fat people were jolly
I just want to get to the point in our relationship where I can get on top of her and fart and we can both laugh...not just me.
We started making out, then he decided to get naked, put on a condom, and proceed to dry hump my leg, sweat pants and all, until he blew his load. I thought this was college. I immediatly left claiming I can't sleep in other people's rooms. He didn't even bother taking off my hoodie.
That's ok. Our relationship has a solid foundation of booze and questionable behavior.
On the plus side I got to ride in a fire truck and I didn't have to blow anybody for it
is it bad that my walk of shame involves the church shuttle?
Whiskey and an unstable home life is apparently the fountain that 20-something boys like to drink from.
Matt you can be anything you want to be. Including the awesome guy that brings pizza to a bunch of stoned and sorta drunk kids.
I wanna go back to school and change my major to psych just to make a case study out of her
We were cuddling in his bed and I asked him a question and followed by making a microphone with my hand and told him to speak into it. If he never talks to me again that's probably why.
My guy issues hinge on tonight's game. Caps win, it's Dustin. Rangers win, Josh. I even flipped a coin to see who got what team
The sad moment you remember you have no power for a week and can't flush.....
Wrong number bro but that sounds like a damn shame.
Dude if I had a dollar for everytime she asked me to do weird shit with her when we were fucking I'd have like 4$
Randomize
