this guy jus got head in a gas station bathroom from this fat chick with one leg
gross dude. was the guy blacked out drunk or something?
yeah and it only cost me 6 dollars
His dick might not be the answer to my problems, but I'm definitely ok with testing it as a possible solution.
man, work is way more interesting with these acid flashbacks.
You know, it doesn't really count as a walk of shame if you guys showered together the next morning
I feel like I just rode a horse, did a million jumping jacks, ran a marathon and need a carton on cigarettes. best sex hands down... EVER
I THREW AWAY MY VIBRATOR BECAUSE IT INTIMIDATED HIM. WORST. DECISION. EVER
Hey do you think you can sew an adult onsie with easy access if you know what I mean!!?? It must have bunny feet.
I swear man, you fly across the country to give a boy your virginity and he suddenly thinks you like him
YOU CANT FOOL THE TOILET
We just saw two bitche in pink capris jazzercising down the road. On Thanksgiving.
Are you sexting with minion stickers right now?
So my ex vomited in front of my door and passed out there
Well I got black out drunk before the rehearsal dinner and berated my family with insults. But other then that it was a good time
I may not have my dignity, pride or sanity but I have my pants.
He ate me out in a golf cart while I watched the sunset. You are so right, golf skirts do provide amazing access.
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