So you refered to him as "monster dick"...not so much
I bought a bottle of 100 proof for the storm. I am going to drink until I pass out. I'm taking bets. 1:30 pm is the over/under.
Im like a co-bf. he pays for her birthday and christmas, but i get all the action.
when i got there he was on top of an air mattress in the middle of the pool with a bag of doritos and a 40 telling people he needed his space.
Don't worry. This time I'll get black out drunk so they'll just think it's an American thing.
you were trying to control your nosebleed while having someone hold your four loko while you drank it through a straw. all at the same time. that is commitment.
Ok if you are accepting my apology, please continue to ignore me. If you are not, please fill out the brief survey that follows, to help me improve my people relations: a) your a bitch please leave me alone b)your crazy pls leave me alone c) I never cared ab u please leave me alone. D) all of the above e) all of the above but I wouldn't mind still fucking u. F) who are you again? Your answer will not b shared and will b used in accord. With the law. TY
My cab driver has a hooker in the front seat. Really, this is serious. And weird.
I've noticed we have slowly begun to phase the "B" out of our Bromance.
I'm so high that hamburger just went up my nose. Mustard BURNS
When we missed a fist bump and simultaneously did the Rocket Power handshake I knew I was going to blow him.
is that a dick in a sweater?
We're gonna have to check the security cameras after last night
We need to know if his feet match his cock.
There’s an entire generation of people out there who didn’t grow up watching Mr. Rogers and it shows. These Boomers need to get their shit together.
Randomize
