i guess you could say your face is two degrees of separation from my balls
Forgot that I saved my paper as "Eat Shit Edwards" and e-mailed it because I missed class. I'm sure Prof. Edwards will be delighted when she gets it. I don't anticipate a passing grade.
I just criticized a porno's use of editing. Film school is ruining me.
It was huge And he was twirling it around. Im telling you, beautiful wonderpenis
He shaved off his eyebrows. This is not my life.
Get out here. Doing shots with the delivery guy. Also, the food is here
Remind me to switch to jello when you decide to do shots off my ass. It's so much easier to clean than this pudding.
you're asking me why i keep burn ointment in my purse.... do you really want to know the answer to that question?
I just explained it as we hate everyone in the world more then we hate each other. Thus making us friends. Plus we drink...a lot
I think drinking is the foundation of our friendship
Is everyone touching their nose at me a sign that I should stop snorting vicodin off my phone in the bathroom at school?
I was able to hide the fact that I had just shit in my pants, and then wupped her ass at FIFA
Please send me a thumbs up pic afterwards. No homo. After you've redressed and are heading for the walk of shame out of course
Did we seriously steal a wet floor sign from McDonald's then get chased down by a homeless man for it? Never drinking again.
I can't decide if I miss drinking or you, they are so closely connected.
I thought he was hot. You know, in a “I’ve gone batshit insane and want blood for the blood god” sort of way.
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