I wanna passion pit in your ass
Black thong, sheer white shorts not a professional look. This chick has no idea what sunlight makes her outfit look like.
i just checked to make sure valentines day this year was on a weekend assuming ill want to be drunk all day
hearing about your life makes me feel so good about mine
She asked how far humans have gone into a volcano because they did in spy kids. She was serious.
Just had flashback to me showering u with stir fry as u rythed on the floor
Yea i think drunk-me kept all my bar receipts, just to throw it in sober-me's face.
I don't need you anyway! I have puppies and booze!
Come to Des Moines on Saturday, handcuff yourself to me and drink a bottle of vodka
Grass is always greener, Allison, grass is always greener
The grass is drunker and I'm lying down on it
i fell into a bathtub last night and broke the fall with my forehead. my forehead is bruised
You partied and then got cock slapped, Don't tell me you didn't have fun
Please tell me you did not shit your Disney princess costume.
We are back but we are listening to stairway to heaven in my car. Amy is air drums. Be back when it's over.
Gave a guy a blowjob in a convent. Place in hell is now secured...
So many questions...the two most important are, where the fuck is my booze and how did you even get the couch through the door?
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