There's a group of australian girls next to me. can't take them seriously. think they are going to turn into mr g
I think she kind of thinks she's better than us now ... please. I go to Michigan.
I was on hold waiting for customer service at verizon so we obviously we had enough time to have sex, i just put the phone on speaker
Is it too much to ask that he stop calling me 'titty fuck' in public?
I had fun this weekend too. According to Web MD, my symptoms say I had a miscarriage.
i'm sitting in the second floor bathroom drinking coronas in the shower. do not find me.
Just saw all the pictures from the party. I'm wearing a different shirt in every single one.
when you agree to fuck a guy it does by NO means make it okay for his roommate to hide in the closet with doritos and watch
At one point I was waiting in line for the port o potties and a storm trooper came out of one and sprayed me in the face with a water gun
Like that actually happened I wasn't hallucinating
He wants to buy me a drink to apologize for sending me a pic of his dick. Welcome to my life.
Can't decide if it was more awkward buying sheets together or disposing of them afterwards
Nothing says Happy Holidays like sending a picture of your ass to the wrong manager.
And I am bleeding like slutty girl #1 In a horror movie
Why does my car smell like burnt toast?
I take it you don't remember trying to make grilled cheese with your cigarette lighter...
I feel like I got hit by a car. But a small car, like a Beetle or a Mini or something.
Randomize
