its summer. and we all know college gfs do not count in summer.
college gfs dont count ever. theyre like getting corn rows in jamaica. you feel cool at the time. then you go home and people make fun of you.
This is the kind of period I feel I should name out of respect to the fact I might have just gotten lucky this time.....
you puked out of a dead sleep and didnt wake up
i have rugburns grass stains and some road rash. im an all terrain slut
I had sex on an exercise ball. The inevitable has occurred.
Something smells like weed and I think it might be my mascara. Come sniff my eyes
The pet store wouldn't sell us fish because they said they could tell we were drunk.
I wish you would just come have sex with me in ihop. I don't want to be here
i think i swapped my keys for drugs last night
I'm ready to get married, then we can lie around watching anime and eating pizza while he rubs baby oil on me
well i don't NEED my liver but it's nice to have one when you're trying to have a good time
Holy shit I've found my last one night stand in my Gran's knitting club
Sorry I crashed a riding mower into your garage door. No hard feelings??
Drunk level: ugly crying in the bar upon discovery of sweet tarts and not smarties.
We hooked up and he sent me home with a plant and skittles lmao
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