thus making me awesome and them whores
i now understand why he chose to have sex with my friend rather then me after lookin in the mirror this morning. and id do the same thing.
You did not just nickname me "Nipples".
I got an 8 ball and a free entrance pass to the strip club, if i dont get laid tonight I never will.
So, do you think I should wash the ashes off of my forehead before going to the strip club?
Like lay upon bear skin rugs, drink brandy and reminisce of the yesteryear's before a majestic fire place? Because those are my plans.
we got kicked out of McDonald's because you kept screaming THAT SHIT CRAY at the woman in front of us because she ordered a fish filet.
...that shit cray.
Thanks for getting me stoned. My manager started quizzing me about the menu and I struggled until he asked me to describe the tortilla soup. I said "tasty"
when you come home i just want to let you know we are cats now. and we are out of eggs.
I deserve to be covered in dicks
Should I be scared that after we hooked up she took antibiotics with Sailor Jerry's?!
Thanks so much for having me, I'm really sorry that I almost caused your dog to catch on fire and also for breaking your doorknob
You keep making the old jokes & I'm gonna come down with a sudden case of low-estrogen related vaginal dryness..
It got weird I got a phone call while looking at porn and the video started playing while on the phone full on porn audio.
You mom sent me some article linking anal sex, damaged prostates and sterility. Does she still think your gonna go straight and have kids one day?
Randomize
