you turned your livingroom into a bong?
i should write a book entitled 'the joys of being sexually objectified'
While my grandpa showed the family a slide show he accidentally included a topless photo of his new gf.
All I did this weekend was get my life in order. I feel like I wasted my time.
What do you wear to apply at a strip club?
That's the international "my vagina is unoccupied, come talk to us" chant. You have your mission. Go.
This gem of a conversation has been brought to you be weed
You can't mix blow jobs, bacon, and Star Wars.
A) just did. And b-z) that sounds like a great Sunday morning.
Only Tommy would bring a stripper pole to a bonfire
So lets not base feelings on vagina tingles
Pretty much just farted directly in a baby's mouth on the subway
Pro tip: If you tell him that his dick looks like a muppet then you won't have to see him again.
This night could easily degenerate into a drunken haze of strippers and gambling, but I need a support network.
I tied him up for his boyfriend so he could get fisted... I'm the best roommate ever.
Wow. That's certainly more than I've ever done for a roommate.
Fucking a younger guy is now a game of odds. The chance that he gives me corona virus is outweighed by the evening of orgasms I know he’ll give me.
Randomize
