hey can i play with your boom stick tonite? I'll let you shoot the love of jesus in my face.
come over
i feel as if last night was a right of passage. to officially be an adult you must have a drunken one night stand with a co-worker and go to work the next day still drunk wearing yesterday's clothes...
I just sold my mom a dimebag. Should I feel scared or sucessful?
I cannot believe I said bareback movement...
cracked out the beer snorkel again. that thing has a five for five record of getting me naked.
raced the clock twice to day to see if i could get off before my computer died and before i left for my noon bar crawl... win, win
lets go back to having secrets in our friendship
This is now the friendly bartender typing for him. He wants to be on you. He is going to "destroy your vagina". Good luck and sorry if this woke you up!
So i am officially handcuffed to the pole on the party bus while taking jello shots.....this shall be an interesting night
Nothing says "future AA member" like bonging 40's out of a plastic flamingo.
After seeing all of the pics during the trial, all I could think was "her vagina doesn't look THAT dangerous"
I shaved last nite, you should see my cock it looks like a beautiful skyscraper
Just gave my thesis presentation, pretty sure I made out with the admissions woman last night.
saying, "have a good fall!" After fucking a virgin boy is good etiquette, right?
I had just gotten to his place and was about to get some dick. No way was I gonna let her negative attitude affect my orgasm feng shui
I'll seduce him with my charm, after all, I am a graceful swan.
More like a demented cow.
Randomize
