I haven't worn deodorant in like three days and have been laying around in my underwear listening to music and drinking. I think i've made my own Bonnaroo in my apartment.
Her vagina smelled like hockey gear.
Are you seriously drinking already? It's 11AM. Still morning.
I'm going by McDonald's time. And since they stop serving breakfast at 10:30 and start serving lunch, it is now afternoon.
it will be a sad day when drinking racks of keystone isnt socially acceptable anymore
At what point did I eat out of your mouth?
I just remember getting him back by licking the window on his truck.
you cried when she wouldn't let you have her bathroom rug.
She compares her life to Teen Mom. She's 28.
In less than 3 minutes we had 3 security guards running after us
While looking for an apartment, I've realized that the way I rate balconies is on the "how easy would it be to smoke weed here" scale.
What other scale is there?
He was wearing an Affliction shirt, a Monster hat, and he asked me for anal within 5 minutes of meeting me. Like 3 strikes and you're out, bro.
I think my ph in my vagina is actually off from the lack of sex I've had this break compared to finals week.
Between fucking and sleeping I woke up missing four out of five of the earrings I was wearing. It's like a star rating system. I had to give him props.
I helped you wax your vagina and you won't even get me Corn Nuts you fucking bitch?
On the flip side, we did almost have sex wearing a gorilla mask and deer antlers.............
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