I'm at the house listening to vengaboys alone. Please come home.
i hate this class. from the way they're all staring you would think they've never seen a girl in basketball shorts, heels and sunglasses.
So two questions...why am I covered in muffins and are there pictures of this.
I truly believe that the solid foundation of any healthy relationship is a drunken one night stand so I can just get all the nasty shit out on the table
I'm going to see if it catches on fire again, then I'll make the decision.
I think the main reason you were throwing up so much was the quart of soap you chugged trying to burp bubbles. you came close
Take off that red sweater and wear my vagina as a facemask.
I left the guinea pigs on the dryer. Make sure to take care of them.
No need to talk. Eventually, he'll either stop coming over, or decide that it's a relationship.
And if not?
...I keep getting free bourbon and great sex with no expectations. You really don't understand that there is no "down side," do you?
The party got hot, we all started raging, took off some clothes, someone threw me in the shower and we all kept raging. Nude Rager, I was there at the point of conception.
look for me at the Giants game I will possibly be the drunk girl passed out by 2nd
At least be KIND OF sobering up before you text me, I've told you before I don't speak vodka unless I've been drinking it with you.
PS WHY wasn't I drinking it with you? Dick.
I just delete my bank app from my phone to have enough storage to download tindr. Is this my life now?
Changed all my ex bf's names to "no" in my phone so the next time I try to drunk text one of them it'll basically be like Russian roulette
He took a shit in my shoe. A part of me is livid and a part of me is impressed because that’s some real evil genius.
Randomize
