doesn't he have a GF?
that just means you have to try harder.
i didn't have to try TOO hard, just told him i didn't want to know his name or...
she's not going to take you seriously with an empty 40 and a sombrero on your head.
Any idea who the guy in my bed tagged as rattlesnake dick might be?
Your penis has nothing to do with my throat infection, sorry...
she tried strangling devon with the garden hose. pretty sure they're broken up
we should look into getting a golf cart for the weekend. i have a feeling legs wont be a sufficient source of transportation.
As I was sneaking out of his house last night his moms lover was sneaking in, he held the door for me...
He's only done it missionary. His world is about to be rocked. Do you know what I look like from behind?
So what kind of fun pills do we have for the amusement park tomorrow?
at first i said "no rollerblading if I'm going to be drunk," but we all know how that went
So much Jack, so little girl.
I'm worried my dog collar isn't going to come in time. I might be trying on dog collars at PetSmart next week. That could get awkward.
immediately after sex he started talking to me about nerdy stuff he meant to text me earlier, I'm completely smitten
i like beer, sex, and cooking. what more can he want?
He just stopped in the middle of undressing for sex to dip his slice of pizza in ranch. I think I’m in love.
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