Whatever, she only has 293 friends, she cant afford to be defriending me..
this morning your mother said to me "sorry to have to meet you like this, in my sons bed" later she said "you never know whos gonna be in there. its scary sometimes"
I actually had fun getting arrested. That high.
He asked if I smoke and I said "only fools like you on the basketball court!" Then I started crying. I think I'm about to have my period.
You said you wanted to start a restaurant called 'Barbecue' where everything is barbecued. You sounded really proud of your concept.
Standing in a circle of girls fistpumping to the word "hospital" while taking shots.... I don't see this ending well, but its fucking fun.
If I take diet pills with my edibles I'll be a perfect person
I have a theory he's part Neanderthal
my vagina hasn't met your boyfriend yet ... makes me sad
I literally was just rolling on the ground and said to her 'this is what dying looks like'
wearing the bible to the ABC party, thought you'd appreciate that.
I've had more jaegerbombs than I can count on 3 fingers
when u match a guy bc he's from Oregon & he's trying to flirt, shut up i just want to talk about trees
Going through his web history. 10 hours ago he searched "how to put on condom with your teeth" I think I'm getting it tonight.
He only has one ball. it was like fucking a cyclops.
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