new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
His mom told be she once got turned down for playboy. 1 biggest mistake Hugh made. 2 is she hitting on me?
fun fact of the day: the man setting up my checking account at my bank has thrown up on my front lawn.
At one point he was so drunk he was carrying around a bottle of patron drinking out of it and falling everywhere and every time he spilled it he would scream "THERE GOES TWENTY DOLLARS."
I hope it's socially acceptable to wear a mesh one piece into last call tonight?
I can't believe I had to sit there pretending to play Halo with a condom on for 20 Minutes because your brother barged in to tell a story.
think I signed up for a 5k last night while blackout.
Great news! In less than 2 hours, I'm ripping your underwear off with my teeth!
He tried to tell me that he could handle his liquor better than "all the bitches in this town." AS HE THREW UP. ALL. OVER.
Woke up naked on a bed full of money, doughnuts, and keys that weren't mine. Unsent dick pick on phone, and cheap cigar butt on my pillow. Also...I maybe hotwired my car.
I be dancing. See you soon. You can drink tequila from my pants.
Seriously??? You send me boob shots with your husband and kids in them???
I added a U.S. Senator on snapchat....casual.
oh dont worry mom i am not sick my cough is from a recent increase in recreational drug use
that will happen
Randomize