i can't wait to go to hell
yeah...all of my friends will be there for sure
Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
pray for me tomorrow cause I have a midterm that I've mostly studied for by watching Bill Nye episodes on the subject...
we turned his baptism video into a drinking game
I feel like I had eight dicks in my mouth
he asked my vagina if she was excited to meet Leonard. LEONARD. His fuckin penis is named Leonard.
Going out so taking the 2nd 1/2 of beer w/ me ont'tube in a Pringles tube. I give money to people on the street that have more self respect.
Well if you're drunk enough to make some mistakes this week I'd be down to redeem myself for my poor performance.
It feels like one of my ribs evaporated.
BTW send me your address and size of condoms you wish your lover was-- "if you build it, they will come"
You're right. I woke up today with my ugly sweater still on and no pants. I'd say it was a successful night.
Also I’m on 3%. Just Incase.. I miss you and I love you and you’re my everything and I’m getting drunk.
Would an open wound count as good sex or bad sex?
screwing the intern at work sucks when u find out the boss is too. She is a smoking hot though
Grandma keeps pulling a bottle of captain from her pocket and spiking people's drinks.. She just yelled "I'm DAMN HOT to be a grandma!" .. I LOVE HER.
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