i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
She wouldn't stop telling me the story of the penis and how she got laid.
i have essays due online every friday...im just going to write 'im hungover' for every one
Haha im about to meet my shrink &i have so much shit to tell him i made an outline
Hahhaha I literally just rolled outta bed and went to get beer in my pj's and slippers. God I love graduating
My friend and I just coined a new term. OBJ. The obligatory blow job. You totally know what I'm talking about.
Like if he goes down on you first, or you just don't want to bone him yet. OBJ.
I just saw the Mona Lisa in the background of a porno. Whole new appreciation for art. fuck you I'm cultured.
I got Pilsbury cinnamon rolls for us to have tomorrow, but I don't have the willpower to leave them in my fridge overnight, so I am eating them all and getting us more in the morning
I love you more by the minute
All I know is I want him to tie me up at least twice a week and I have an overwhelming urge to cook for him. Could this be love? I'm so confused....
He told me we shouldn't hang out because it would be weird and then snap chatted me a picture of his dick
I'm fucking my way through California and it's kind of fun.
If I don't answer right away it's because I took an Adderall and the fridge needs cleaned.
My new favorite word is dickbag. I think its relevant here. And I say that with all the love in the world.
Last night this creepy guy asked me my name and I told him it was Jaundice and he called me that all night
My ovaries melted while we were talking. I almost told him I would suck his soul out through his dick
That would be a memorable parent teacher conference for sure
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