Wooohooo! I'm sitting in the car like a creep watching people walk in and out of Blush. Lots of happy people.
you made me watch la bamba, and then you yelled at me for disrespecting your mexican heritage.
Life lesson: using the oven as a heater= $500 electric bill
God gave me these boobs for a reason other than for people to throw things down them.
On another note, convinced a 9 year old my hickey was actually a zombie bite.
I think I sprained my soul last night
Ikeep having to ask jim if I'm actually talking. I canmt feel my body...this is what Christmas is all about
Quick question, when did I develop feelings, and how can I make them go away?
That's two questions.
Dude, I just had the best sex of my life in a porta potty at the NCAA girls lax championships but didn't get her name or number. But I have her sunglasses. How is this possible, I'm sad.
I love your life.
its cute though when you google his name more than one mug shot comes up from different states
my brain is opting to stay half drunk rather than relearn how to think. the rest of me is in no position to argue.
Just ate Panda Express. Fortune cookie had no fortune in it. I actually prefer this. Less broken dream potential.
just yelled CURVEBALL at my nightie because it turned out to be a pair of shorts
Wait an hour then go and untie him. Bring toilet paper and some spare underwear. Want anything from Starbucks?
A girl just managed to steal a whole gallon of ice cream. I'm letting her go because that is impressive.
Randomize
