Ikea night.
?
Insert tab A into swedish slot B
Actually, all he talks about is how great the sex is with her and how crappy you were at it. Stop being a bitch and gossiping masking it as self-righteousness.
how can i change my meal plan to a keystone plan?
It was then that he suggested we all nibble ears. A nibble circle.
I just gift wrapped bread.
So I've only had a mustache for about 5 minutes and I'm already pretty sure it's the best decision I've ever made.
He was just lying on my lap in the backseat screaming how if the cops came he was a blanket.
I ran into a hotel and told the doorman he was doing a great job. That was before you cried on my jacket.
I still have beer shits from last weekend. Dying from dysentary is a real threat at this point.
No, it's cool, I just bounced from the hospital. I was...talking to a security guard, maybe?
I've lost every trace of self esteem. Even sneaking a BJ in the coffee room has lost it's luster.
Please just help me figure out where the bruise on my face came from.
He broke his arm in a fistfight with the bouncer. it was neat.
If it were up to me his wife would never get his penis again, but I guess they have some sort of arrangement
Yes, an arrangement called marriage
Stop saving videos when you’re using my pornhub account!!! My girlfriend just tried to finger my butt because she thinks I’m into that
Randomize
