As long as he sees me topless I don't care. Redemption. REEEDDDEMMMPPPTTIIIOOONNNNN
What's the address?
Too drunk. Just google it.
IT'S YOUR HOUSE
he said he'd buy me TWO burritos if I took my shirt off
HEY. That drawer full of booze in my dorm room also has aspirin and Tums in it. So don't tell me I don't care about health.
If it makes you feel any better, I had my finger up some guy's butt today... Dominatrix training, ya know...
I JUST MADE OUT WITH A BRITISH SOCCER PLAYER. LONG LIVE THE QUEEN. GOD BLESS THAT COUNTRY.
I'm covered in glow paint and I can't find my shirt. So, successful night
First poop in my apartment for the summer, officially settled in. :)
I literally wonder, frequently, "Will anyone ever fuck me until i go cross eyed for 2 hours again?''
At least you didn't sleep with Ashley's uncle.
Why is there cereal literally EVERYWHERE?
It didn't follow directions.
I have in my possession one ukulele shaped package.
The cat was building a spaceship out of the carpet, my legs were cans of tomato sauce, and there was something else in that pot you gave me.
It really hurts to walk. Any idea what happened to my hip?
The covid immunization shot lady also sold me a mondo bag of really good pot.
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