I'm fucking your sister right now.
You motherfucker
She's next.
.....so he has a son. Josh. That is not his roommate
alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
omg my older sister has been googling "how do I know if I've had an orgasm?" and "bj tips". the family laptop is not meant for this...
he's having a long distance Facebook-coordinated power hour. the status update has 159 comments ...
He just did a 33 second keg stand with a fractured leg, busted chin and chipped teeth from running into a parked car after winning a race.
How do you get mayonnaise out of... well jesus it's everywhere, let's start with carpets
Look what our sorority has done to us...we're hitting on girls in hopes of getting an awesome little.
Were at her birthday dinner and her dad keeps buying me shots saying when I was your age I fucked the shit outta girls
Hahahahahaha remind him your dating his daughter
Congratulations, you have helped solved the mysterious disapperance of Dani's phone which was found in the munchies cabinet next to the oreos. Your reward is star power as well as a fat ass bowl of Nebula. You may proceed through the wardrobe and into Narnia for your prize.
woke up next to the new dishwasher. set the record for banging a new employee to 6 hours...i should be a professional sexual predator
I was telling my friend about your penis and the only word I could think of was voluptuous. You have a voluptuous dick.
Just whatever you do, don't neglect the balls.
i got home safe but then alex started a fire so now we're at the hospital
Grrr. Fine. You get oral for being unwrong.
Randomize
