i'm starting to get pissed at how pandora is trying to force coldplay on me
i'll give you all the meat in my fridge in exchange for 2 condoms.
Now I'm watching The History of Sex on the History Channel. They're talking about how repressed the 30s were. I think I understand why grandma is such an angry person.
Two girls down stairs, two girls up stairs and....
We've got ourselves a situation
Sad news: I might have to institute a "once-per-day" policy on getting trashed downtown. Sorry, reputation.
Frozen waffles and wine. Loneliness-party of one
is it sad that i can honestly say it was the best birthday sex i've ever had and it was still terrible?
You chest bumped everyone we walked by on the way home... Even girls
And he came all over himself. At least he didn't ruin my new lulus.
Actually though that could've been bad.
You puked on the bar then proceeded to walk out. I told the bartender some girl walked up, puked and left and he gave me a free drink. Hope you got home safe.
Our motto for the night: BLACK OUT OR BACK OUT.
That's our motto every night.
He's ninety percent amazing leader, brother, and teacher, and ten percent unforgivable douche. These are the men I look up to in my life.
Also I think I realized when my life started to turn into shambles.. The day I took my high school senior picture WITH A HICKEY ON MY NECK
It's not even 8 pm, or Saint Patrick's Day, and Kevin is drunk on my roof humping the air
I can't take 'get a man' advice from you. You'll stick your penis in a warm banana peel.
Randomize
