i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
I need to buy a mesh tank top to fit in in Florida. Where do they even sell that shit?
My mom's crying. That means it must be Christmas.
Missing a small section of hand. Hope your night is going better
There's a 24 hour period after giving head where you can't eat penis shaped food without me laughing at you
and then he started using my ass as a stressball
Wait, is this the kid that tried catching a bat in your backyard with a flashlight and a ball of tin foil?
It's like a new game! Find out if he's circumcised without actually seeing it
Rush week is fine, only the t-shirts are white and if it rains, the frat boys in their lawn chairs will be treated to 800 freshmen girls in their first wet tshirt contest.
Welcome to college.
I'm gonna give him birthday punches. On the dick. With my mouth.
Don't they also have a lot of serious head injuries?
I didn't say I wanted to marry one of them. Or that I want one to perform surgery on me. I just want to have hot, dirty, MMA style sex.
im watching blue is the warmest color at the music box and this dude is literally masturbating 3 feet in front of me
"I'm a professor to university students" I say as I realize I have a nipple piercing that I have no memory of getting
He asked me to come stay with him so he could "see that ass and watch Harry Potter."
I woke up under a house in Key West
Randomize
