But it was well worth it to see a man fly through the air in a beaver costume...
She stole my hamster. idk who she was, she just walked in and said she knew Keith so she stayed, drank 6 beers, and then stole Charles.
Registered sex offender is the model in class today.... There are too many things wrong with him getting naked in front of a lot of college students.
His and hers buttplugs were a resounding success. Tru luv
listen. he fixes things. buys me drinks and sticks his penis in my vagina. age means nothing at this low point in my life.
Woke up naked on a bed full of money, doughnuts, and keys that weren't mine. Unsent dick pick on phone, and cheap cigar butt on my pillow. Also...I maybe hotwired my car.
Would 7 layered rainbow jello shots entice you?
How many drinks/blunt hits do you think I could get if I wore an "it's my birthday" shirt
We got banned from that Whataburger for life. WHATABURGER. Which is saying something. They deal with drunk dumbasses every night.
Tequila happens.
My Dicks been hard all day. Poor guy isn't used to vacation being over
She tried doing a backflip and ended up doing somersaults down the entire stair case.
That sad moment when the drawer I used to keep condoms in now has poptarts in it..
It's almost 5am and all I can keep thinking is IT'S WHISKEY TIME!!
Got so drunk I broke my sink in half. Not. Lying.
They're doing CPR to someone in the middle of Victoria's Secret. Way to block the undies, damnit!
Randomize
