I reminded them that I didn't puke and I cleaned yours up! So huh!
Every time a guy reaches down to touch my vag, i feel really sorry for all the transgender girls who still have a penis there.
That's weird cause every time i feel a girls vag i feel way worse for all the guys who reached down there and got a penis.
He was legit dry humping me to the sportscenter theme song, awkward i think SO.
Single handedly the worst sex I've ever had just went down. Its like we both laid there after word-less thinking about the other " could they be any worse in bed" ?
I can't even type what I drank. I'll throw up
I took in his dog. My exboyfriend still calls me for 2 things, blow jobs and animal rescue. I need to end this cycle
If you're wearing dry underwear your day is already better than mine.
So I just bought e from my sophomore home ec teacher. How's your weekend going?
Neither a grow-er nor a show-er. More like a no-er. If he didn't have testicles, I'm not sure you could tell he was a male, even standing there naked. There will be no second date.
You dropped my mother on the dance floor. She has a concussion. You didn't apologize. Don't speak to me for a while.
Who's the captain of your team? Captain Morgan as usual?
And me
I woke up on some strangers couch covered in salad mix and oatmeal cream pies. The struggle is absolutely real.
Almost stopped showering halfway through to go get food
MDMA IS GREAT AND YOU WERE THE WORST GIRLFRIEND EVER.
really who shits their pants then locks themselves out of their apartment? ... I threw my underwear out in a random bathroom
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