Bea Arthur died! :(
What?
Big bird passed.
why is jon gosselin on the news 24/7 for dating some new lady?? how bout I get on msnbc for not getting laid since forever ago
AHHHH!!! note to self never google image chastity belt omfg
Thru out the entire phone conversation I went from thinking: he's making a gay come-on, to he's trying to sell me drugs, before realizing he was offering me a job with an internet company. Things are gonna be awkward in class this week.
I left two hundred in singles in your car sorry about the mess
Woke up and there was a kayak in the pool. Are you alive?
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
is there a way to sugar-coat "shes in jail" when someone is texting me asking where their friend is?
All together there was 318 cigarette butts in the pool... And my microwave.
You never know how much you love your bed until you sleep with 4 other people in your car.
I know it's just really hard to give up sex and cigs during a blizzard
FUCK YOU IM DRINKING WINE FROM A BOX
You okay there or need a ride? Maybe a straw for your box
Maybe a straw...
My fuck buddy just proposed... Correct me if I'm wrong, but doesn't that completely defeat the purpose of FRIENDS with benefits?
Now you can be friends with Insurance Benefits.
I am mentally ready for anal.
I guess I'm famous. Hot lesbian was WARNED about me. Still hooked up with her.
I'll pay you to teach me.
Randomize