a mothers knocking is a guaranteed boner softener
I understand why you refuse to be sober now
I mean I knew we were putting on quite a show but I didnt realize HOW good until I woke up and 4 people were passed out with their ears to the bedroom door.
I got used. This is the happiest day of my life. I was just a huge cock and that is all she needed.
I made mike pull over so I could lay in the grass. He made me get up cuz I looked dead and people were passing. It was like 6:30am.
her best friend is in town and she told me that they used to fool around when they were drunk and I'd have to "help keep that from happening"
you motherfucker
I figure hes like disneyworld. You know youre only going once or twice in life. Might as well have fun and ride the rides
When the question of, do you know who's ass has been on the cake you are eating is said... Good or bad party?
Wake up, take the dog to the trails, puke in the woods. More days should start like this.
Beautiful fucking linguistics Shakespeare, but youre still not doing that to my face
Things were easy when he was just a penis. Now he's a penis with feelings.
The best of us have puked in our office garbage cans. I just hope yours wasn't the metal mesh kind...and bagless like mine. Rock n roll office manager.
My concierge just asked me to his place for dinner while I was signing for a delivery. The delivery was a box of vibrators. Let's discuss.
Then he shook the next streetlight but this one broke and fell over. He told me, "This is the part where we run."
Dude, tumbleweeds have been rolling through my bed lately. This is my dryest dry spell since I was married.
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