yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
Ahhh... Adderall running out my nose in the shower really brings back memories.
Its like everytime i see you, my vagina gets a heartbeat.
If you're trying to subtly tell me that I look like Connie Chung, just stop it. I already know.
do you remember the combo for the lock to my pants?
We could supplement the Tour with Edward Andre-hands. Because 40s are for the 99%.
I think we need to teach you what straight means again
I haven't filled him in on Operation "find a sugar daddy & suck dick for money" yet, but I'm sure he just wants me to be happy.
I have no idea how but i got a hold of a blue food dye packet. And proceeded to rub it all over my tits. So yeah i'd say its safe to say i'll be known as smurfette for a while
Just went over my top ten highlight reel with that guy I'm fucking. It was like we were sports announcers. But about sex.
she doesn't even know what year it is. She just stumbles around life with a bottle of rum
Can you masturbate to someone liking your instagram picture?
The blunt fell in the hottub, i mean i knew she was upset but i didnt expect her to dive for it and come up balling her eyes out...
Gatorade without vodka just doesn't taste the same
I’d clean the kitchen before making food. Mark “rang in the New Year” with some rando in there last night
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