Remember that night when i almost got you arrested? Is that funny yet?
Who keeps a bong in their car??
Kids who graduated high school two weeks ago.
I want to punch and suck your dick at the same time. I don't think we have the healthiest of relationships.
The last thing i remember is saying breakfast beer and carrying the keg to my room and locking the door.
I just spent 30 minutes cleaning out my coleman grill. Did you really have to have grilled yogurt?
What started as a "classy" double date ended with Jeremy and I tripping our balls off and talking to the refrigerator while the girls cried on the couch and questioned where their lives were heading.
I wasn't trying to be rude when I hurriedly walked past you, but I can not put in to words exactly how bad I had to shit.
He's basically me if I was an 8-yr-old boy. It's like looking into a pudgy terrifying mirror
Are sex swings allowed in dorms
I really dont wanna go to a traffic light party. I have nothing red to pretend I'm taken with. Without something red my "my girlfriend is away in the mines" story wont work.
You have amazing self restraint. If there was one thing I could learn from you, that wouldn't be it. I love my life as it is.
you made cordon bleu at 4am and declared you were Marshall Stewart
Can we smoke pot out of a menorah?
after last night, ive never not wanted to live so much in my life.
Once someone takes a shit in your toilet they are no longer a guest.
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