I just realized that when I walk away people probably say "wow she really has a drinking problem" and sadly it doesn't bother me.
Yeah, but there's no serving sizes for dick.
I will probably be peed on at some point today.
now that you've tased me I refuse to buy you flowers
The floor and the wall just switched. I'm falling.
Just got motor boated by a horse in the street
Do you think I threw out my left shoulder during the keg stand or the stripper pole? It's medically relevant my chiropractor wants to know.
What was the name of that place where we saw that concert? It was like a warehouse and some guy was living in the loft above the stage...
It's called: a legit place to drop acid.
I think Vodka is my favorite. Everything else ties for second.
I saw a guy do a line this morning in line to start the 5k, happy thanksgiving!
just once I'd like to not pass out before we leave the designated pre-drinking place
Well we went from the roof to the stairwell to an air mattres. One day were going to fuck in a bed
I keep having dreams where I tie him up and eat cookies off of him while riding him. Wtf brain.
hotelroom bed is big enough to masturbate in, but small enough to not want to sleep in it after you've masturbated in it
If that pentatonix bullshit is playing when I get home we're breaking up
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