I love how its suddenly "not all about sex" now that he can't get it up
im holly from the hills drunk
The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
I just masterbated while imagining him getting hit by a truck. I have hit a completely unacceptable level of anger & bitterness. Help.
I'm taking her home. She just told a 90 yo woman in a packers hat to "suck her cock".
Just so you know there's a random man downstairs knocking on a door with a dozen roses and a 30 pack of beer. Unattractive or not, I'm inviting him in.
Freshman Move In Day, its like Christmas in August.
Dude, how the hell did you become an RA?
It's a sign that no dudes december is about to start: I have a yeast infection.
Thanks for letting me rent out your vagina rec room. I don't expect the security deposit back.
Currently siting in the living room naked, staring at one of the girls across the street in her living room naked. This is like the most intense starting contest of all time.
Chris used to fill up a Camel Back for thirsty Thursday. God I really miss him, do you remember when he gets out of jail?
whenever i get involved w someone i'm gonna give you their number to testify to the fact that they should not fall in love with me
Yeah I knew you'd like him. He's emotionally and physically self destructive.
We would have so much to talk about!
Actually new year, new me. I haven’t had sex yet so technically I’ve been a virgin all year.
Sorry I’m late. Got horny watching the traffic report and had to rub one out
Randomize
