If you think im a hippy you should see these girls. They would scissor mother nature if they had the chance.
You did not just nickname me "Nipples".
Just set all my clocks a minute apart. Now my 4:20 is longer by sixfold
possible father of this baby just finished his test first in a lecture of 200 people. other possible father finished about 100th.
I'm rooting for #1.
LSD in a sugar cube. Dropped it in my whiskey sour and felt like I was rowing a boat.
You shouted "FUCK SHANIA TWAIN" and then downed an Aquafina bottle of white wine none of us knew how to react
I just read "to infinity and beyond" as "to infidelity and beyond" something is seriously wrong with my psyche
And to add, there was a fat guy right next to me who, when the girls would shake their butts, he would let out a shrill xena warrior princess cheer
Sorry, I thought I responded to your question. My name is Jon, we kinda had a sleepover at your friends place in OC. Don't know if you remember me, you were "dick chugging" like there was no tomorrow last night.
Nothing like a little chlamydia diagnosis to ring in the new year
Oh, btw, UPS might come by. Drunk me ordered us $75 worth of gummy airhead starburst type candies. Whatever it is, it'll be delicious.
the best part is that i get to keep the pot plants and he still has my name tattooed on his ass
He is a beautiful butterfly covered in tattoos and naked.
Would you laugh at me if I told you I think I burned my nipples?
Ccatlin cimbing thru th sunroof plz come
Randomize
