More tranny stories later!
Do you realize that Last night you pissed in my closet and then walked to the bathroom to wash your hands?
is it bad that the cashier at chick-fil-a shouted "see you tomorrow!" as i drove away?
I just got fire extinguished by his roommate while we were having sex. That's just taking cock blocking to a whole new level.
It's just a condom. Most people would commend me for saying I was going to start using them, and you're acting like I'm going to try heroin.
mid blow job she looked up and said "we aren't even facebook friends!"
I AM SUCH A BETTER PERSON ON DRUGS
Whoever decided it was a good idea to sell 40's at a bar with life-sized jenga deserves a nobel prize.
I cannot believe this. A potential 2016 Olympiad wants my vag. To which I respond "GO FOR THE GOLD"
you have to be that girl in the audience holding up the sign that says i fucked the shit out of you
I just rolled over in bed and felt a bump. Turns out it was a lil nug. Talk about being princess and the weed.
Me and a 30 year old man are sitting in my bathtub in swimsuits drinking straight rum from the bottle. Don't tell me how fucked up your Christmas is.
I want to get back to junior year skinny- without all the drugs.
It's getting harder and harder to find People to carry her home
She shouldn't drink
Seriously dude...who threw up on Michelle? She's been crying for like an hour
Goat in kitchen.....explanation?....
Randomize