ignore voicemail. the cock hath been unblocked.
As it would turn out, "jesusssssss" is not the password to enter Faith Chapel's wifi network.
we made out inside of a kiddie slide for about 20 mins. it was the sexiest, most suffocating experience I've ever had
You put your shot glass in your waistband and then told me how convinent it was.
your mom just called me and asked me why i'm not in jail with you right now.
My life has only gotten better since they built a playground behind the bar
Like. I probably should fuck him. I owe him for breaking his thumb.
When I take mushrooms I can feel your presence down there. I can feel where Africa is too.
there is no excuse for drinking mascato in your room alone while listening to one-hit wonders from the 90s
I would have gladly let him decapitate me with the way he was biting on my neck.
Remember, ur body isn't a visitors center
They put paint on their hands and tried to see how many times they could touch me before I woke up.
Judging by this purple one they got to second base.
A lumberjack bearing the gift of small oranges or gymnast sex... I love you man but you lose that battle 9 out of 10
Ok, they now been on the roof for two days. I can see 4 cases of teecate and a carton of smokes. They are yelling at "fucking fall" and pissing off the roof.
You walked in with a bag of weed and asked for a watermelon. For some reason they actually gave you one, and you made it into a perfectly working bong. Two of them offered their girlfriends to you for the night.
Randomize
