i keep myself tagged when other girls look bad/ugly so i look better
I saw him at work today and he gave me a really awkward "I know what you do drunk" look...
I went to the gynecologist and they said, "you're the most fun person we've ever had," and i thought, "that's exactly why i'm here!"
I may have just googled Muppet Treasure Island drinking game
So i guess i slapped the girl sitting next to me leg and said "You know what they say, got fat legs...you gotta fat BOX"
She keeps referring to it as an "us" Either she is seriously mistaken on what fuck buddies are or she learned another meaning of the word "us"
This is worse that I thought. He's playing violin for me.
Isiahs hammered. And just came in to get his skateboard and said he has to prove something. This can't end well
They got a 10 foot tall beach ball from the roof of a McDonalds. Get the fuck over here.
Guess who just got out of a ticket because the cop liked her costume? THIS GIRL.
Mid stroke she told me she'd had bigger. Replied I could tell. Sex ended right at that moment.
last thing I remember is yelling 'sit on my face' through a traffic cone
all I got out of honors convocation is I've hooked up with a lot of smart guys
Truth. Though I have held steadfast to the notion while the rest of you wavered. I had faith in his homosexuality.
Trust me, I’ve got a sixth sense about dicks that tells me if a guy knows how to fuck and it’s tingling. You need to prove me right!
I’m not going to bang him just to confirm your Dickth Sense
The Dickth Sense!!! I love it! It’ll be our first porno!
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