Just set all my clocks a minute apart. Now my 4:20 is longer by sixfold
eat the baked goods on the counter at your own risk... i made them while i was angry and drunk so they most likely have pubes in them
I actually enjoy jerking off to her facebook more than I enjoy actually fucking her. Just something with our generation
Im having a christmas reunion party tonight. Last year i ate my own contact. We'll see how this year goes
Someone was asleep on the couch next to us and woke up. We paused and he yelled "gentlemen, behold! Sex!"
My face feels like its stuck between a ball sack and an asshole.
Is eating fries while lying on the floor bad for you?
If I choke and die at least I will have been doing something I love
Please just fuck her. She's new to LA and doesn't know anyone nice.
Just jacked in the family restroom in the hospital while eating beef jerky and looking at reddit gone wild.
Glass of stolen champagne in a to go cup = tastiest hangover cure ever
Amazon is not showing any promising results for penis tree toppers and I am genuinely surprised. Clearly this is a market that needs to be addressed.
It finally happened my mom knowingly gave me money to buy drugs i knew this day would come\n
Why are you barefoot at a strip club?
I guess I was running around slapping people in the face with a slice of turkey telling them that the only way to beat alcohol addiction is to go cold turkey.
You’re going to be a doctor, and I’m going to be a trophy wife. We both have goals
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