3:38a: you guys up to anything right now?
is it bad that the first thing i do when i get downstairs is go on farm town?
Apparently I signed "I love you" on my bar tab last night.
her teeth should be alot whiter from all of those blowjobs she gives
Its only tuesday and I need a dd home from work. This is getting too easy.
i can't believe you just compared my dick to leprosy
yes, i was eatting raw cookie dough and fingering myself at the same time.... is there a problem?
He looks like he got hit by a weed-eater with chlamydia
Sadly him cutting me out of the duct tape dress was NOT the most awkward part of the night. It was a littleeee moist under there.....
Sunshine is the equivalent of sprinkling whore pellets on campus.
Would nail polish remover take gorilla glue off my nipples? We had a strange night.
Dude just the look on his face when she sat down next to him, threw one leg over his, and just said "so..." was fucking amazing
I taught a straight girl about grindr today. She showed me tinder. It was like some sexual cultural exchange program
Also, your girlfriend apologized to me about yesterday. That was nice of the cunt.
I think I pulled a boob muscle during phone sex
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