We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
She thinks she is all that and a bag of skittles but I'm definitely not tasting the rainbow...
oh vodka. i could write you a sonnet.
Upperdeckered the toilet. Took sombrero off, drawing too much heat. Witnessed glassing. In bush, come findme.
He yelled "juice on the loose", yes i am sure i need plan b
I haven't found him passed out in the living room covered in noodles for a while now so I guess he's getting better with the drinking.
Tried to make out with a statue, turns out it was a person.
All i want to do is drink fuck and cry... you dont have to cater all three its more like the saddest choose your own adventure ever
There was enough sluts here for 2 threesomes to happen at the same time, and you still struck out. What did you do to piss off karma so much?
So the bitch asked me if I wanted the name brand or the generic contraceptive. Does it look like I want to be generically pregnant?
Thanks for the pic It's going to be lovely dealing with my boner while I'm in a meeting with your father.
You need to finger her with the Spock hand sign since she loves Star Trek.
I just kept hitting the drum to get thru the crowd to the bar. Surprisingly it worked
was that the third sophomore you've banged this week?
third one in three days
He showed up completely drunk with a 30 of PBR and ten cans of Spam. I like this kid.
Randomize